Burnout: Empty Cups and How to Fill Them

Burnout has been having another moment on social media and in my life, so I found it fitting to write about it this week.

I am well acquainted with burnout. She and I are good friends. We don’t spend a lot of time together regularly but, when we reconnect, it’s like we never spent time apart in the first place.

In university, I experienced the worst burnout of my life in my final year.

Two of my five courses had assignments due every week. My Tuesdays began at nine a.m. and ended at eight p.m.. On top of this, I began my final year group thesis and was expected to lead my group as if I knew what I was doing.

I barely got through the semester, spent the vacation recovering, and then pressed on as though nothing had happened.

Until last year when she met up with me again. And then yet again this year.

That’s when I realised the pattern.

If I find myself getting burnt out routinely, I have to question why that is. I know I tend towards being a very all-or-nothing type of person—and you’ll find that I’m far more oriented towards the former—and, historically speaking, I’m not very good at taking care of myself. That answer is easy enough.

But knowing this about myself, I have to ask myself the more important questions: “How do I break this cycle? How do I prevent this from happening again?”

You might be familiar with the expression, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” If you think about it in those terms, burnout happens when you pour until you’re completely empty and then keep pouring.

(The image is not a logical one but burning yourself out is, perhaps, not a logical thing.)

That expression really captures the point well, but it’s not very helpful if you don’t know how to keep your cup filled in the first place. I’ve spent the last month or so figuring what that looks like for myself and broke it down into a two-step process:

1. Place boundaries on the things that empty you.

Sometimes these boundaries are internal decisions. It’s committing to stop all work at five p.m.. It’s refusing to let your mind dwell on work on your weekends.

Sometimes it’s taking action. It’s opting out of an activity entirely. It’s sticking up for yourself and saying no when people try to pile things onto your plate.

Your ability to do either of these things depends on your circumstances but, whatever you can do, make the boundaries non-negotiable.

2. Find dedicated time for the things that fill you up.

For me, it’s taking walks around my neighbourhood, carving out quiet moments for prayer and musing, doing mindfulness exercises throughout the day, and spending quality time with the people I love.

There are many ways you can think of this. Some people would describe this as self-care. Some call them coping mechanisms. I call them survival tactics. Regardless, these activities are what stand between me and my good ole pal burnout and so they are crucial.

That’s how I keep my cup filled. I hope this inspires you to discover how you can do the same. I’d love to know if you have other methods, so drop a comment and let me know!

Until next time,

Siobhan K